HumorMatterstm

Christmas

Top 10 Elf Pet Peeves
(shared by colleague Dr. Laugh)

10. After too much eggnog, Mrs. Claus is "all hands." 

 9. Ever since they hit the big time, those damn Keebler Elves  act like we don't exist. 

 8. Santa keeps asking, "Does this suit make me look fat?" 

 7. That idiot Blitzen always mistaking you for a chew toy.

 6. You're enjoying the Jacuzzi, and Santa gets in naked.

 5. Now have to work through coffee breaks thanks to the McCaughey septuplets.

 4. It's at least a thousand miles from North Pole to nearest strip club. 

 3. Next to "race" on the census forms, there's never a box marked "elf." 

 2. Hookers who laugh when you take your pants off. 

 1. Health plan doesn't cover sleigh rash.

Jokes

Chrisnukah

Santa's Stats

Holiday Images

Santa's Bad Day

Signs of Christmas

Santa's Medical Chart

Twas the Nite Alternatives

Holiday Wishes Disclaimer

Christmas Fruitcake Recipe

Twas the Nite Before Finals

Christmas Wishes in "Brief"

Test Your Christmas Song IQ
Our most popular page

Politically Correct Christmas Poem

Martha Stewart's Holiday Countdown

Santa Must Be a Woman & here's proof!

The Night Before Christmas--On the Internet

Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged

Twas the Nite before Christmas (A Lawyer's Perspective)

Twas the "Net" before Christmas (A Computer's Perspective)

Arranging a Politically Correct Holiday Party at the Workplace

Difference Between Christmas and Hannukah

Mom's Request of Santa 

The Magic of Santa

Bush Goes to Court To Prevent Santa Recount

You Know You have a Bad Mall Santa When...

The 12 Days of Christmas, Presents and All

Martha Stewart's Christmas letter 
to Erma Bombeck and Erma's response.

12 Days of Christmas with a Baby

12 Days After Christmas

The Gift Not Wanted

Christmas Riddles

Elf Pet Peeves

The Meaning of the Holidays in 2001

For Christmas humor that is of a mildly 
"adult" nature click here.