Definitions of Humor

Kid's Riddles

This first one is not a riddle but it will get you started.

A little girl goes to see the doctor. She's got a pea in one nostril, a grape in the other, and a string bean stuck in her ear. She says to the doctor, "I don't feel good."

The doctor replies, "The problem is clear to me. You're not eating right!"

New Riddles May, 2000

What did the chewing gum say to the shoe?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


What did the the silly comedian bake on his day off?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


What is black and white and pink all over?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


What did one mountain say to the other mountain?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


What bird steals from the rich to give to the poor?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


What did the toilet say to the other toilet?qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! what are 4, 2, 28 and 44?"qmark2.gif (325 bytes)


1.Why did the woman wear a helmet at the dinner table?



2. Why didn't the hotdog star in the movies?



3. Have you heard about the restaurant on the moon?



4. What do you call a fairy that hasn't taken a bath?



5. Why do birds fly south?



6.What time is it when an elephant sites on a fence?



7. Which word in the dictionary is spelled incorrectly?



8. What is the cannibals favorite game?



9. What do you call a scared dinosaur?



10. Why are Teddy Bears never hungry?



11. Who granted the fish's wish?



The following was submitted by HumorMatters visitor Kara

12. How do change a pumpkin into another vegetable?


13. Why is Dracula so unpopular?





14. If you are American outside of the bathroom what are you when you are inside the bathroom?





15. What did the snail say when she climbed up on the turtle's back?






16. Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund?





The next 2 riddles are from Internet Surfer Kelly age 16.

17. Who always steals the soap in the bathroom?





18.  What do you call a lamb attack ship?

Humor Matters™

Steven M. Sultanoff, Ph.D.
Mirthologist and Clinical Psychologist
3972 Barranca Pkwy. Suite J-221
Irvine, CA 92606